From SuspireWiki
Hadith Jibril
04:00 - 30 December 2006
This is the first. The most important of all ahadith. It solidifies the faith, and is the most potent catechism I can think of for Islam. The hadith deals with the angel of Allah, Jibril, or Gabriel in the anglicized, testing Muhammad, Allah's blessing and peace be upon him, on matters of faith.
Tell me about ihsan, virtue.
It is to worship Allah as if you see Him; for if you do not see Him, surely He sees you.
Practice is a prerequisite for faith. Passive belief is useless. This is what this hadith says, and this would seem to be why I have recalled it. It is one of my favorites. I embark on a small work in the way of Allah, so it is fitting that I choose the most fundamental to recall. I have consciously chosen this hadith for the first one, and further probing seems at the time, fruitless.
Surah XIV - Ibrahim
12:00 - 30 December 2006
In about the twenty third verse I began to fixate on a line:
If He will, He can put you away and bring a new creation; that is surely no great matter for Allah
If he will. If he will. This troubles me somewhat. It leaves all to Allah and takes recourse to action out of the believers' hands. It is, if you will, an antithesis to the sentiment I derived from Hadith Jibril, that I am not only empowered to act and change myself but required to.
I do not seek the coils because I believe Allah will forgive me. I seek them because I do not want to believe in this idea that I will be changed If He will. The potential for futility, the motivation towards passivity, frightens me. Perhaps the sun looming high in the heavens humbles me before Allah's radiance and power. It draws out my fears, and here is this verse.
Surah XXVI - The Poets
16:00 - 30 December 2006
The superficial connection lies in that I was reading a volume of Jelaladin Rumi that I've kept with me for a good many years. The Mystic and Poet and Muslim would undoubtedly put poets on the mind, and it's a small jump to the recitation of the Surah.
Odd though, this is not a surah about poetry, or poets, really. The surah, which speaks on the flight of the Jews from Egypt under Moses, primarily, draws its name from the following verse:
Shall I tell you on whom the Satans come down? They come down on every guilty impostor. They give ear, but most of them are liars. And the poets -- the perverse follow them;
This would seem a condemnation of the poets. They are liars, and the perverse. In the eyes of Allah, so am I. But there is nothing wretched about Jelaladin. He transcends, through different means, for a different curse. We are the same, though I'm no mystic. He is cursed with loss, and a madness, and transcends through selflessness. I am cursed with vampirism, and seek to transcend through something less intuitive. Through coils, through faith, and through my own will. The reason for this choice then, seems perfectly illuminated.
Surah XXX - The Greeks
18:00 - 30 December 2006
23:00 - 31 December 2006
Again the superficial reasoning, is that I've been studying the Greek language ferociously so that I can read over the Greek manuscripts from which many later Arabic works were largely translated. A future study I suppose. There may be more here, but I can not uncover it within my own psyche.
Surah LXXXVI - The Night Star
23:00 - 30 December 2006
They are devising guile, and I am devising guile. So respite the unbelievers; delay with them awhile
The obvious connection is to dealing with the situation surrounding Pfeiffer. The encroaching Invictus, the moves against us. The delirious ramblings of the broken-spirited Spears. They are devising guile, and I am devising guile. It's the instinct, to work against and counteract. Neutrality demands all my guile and politicking be purely defensive, but all the same. Dragons are not stupid. For every plan against us, we will find an answer, because Allah knows who does his work.
It's these few verses from the end of the very short surah that stuck with me so long after the recitation.Respite the unbelievers; delay with them a while.
It speaks to my relationship with my fellow Dragons here. They do not believe what I believe, but there is a fundamental similarity between us. So it is well in Allah's eyes, that I should be with them now, and work with them, for we all do the will of Allah here.
Surah LXXXIX - The Dawn
04:00 - 31 December 2006
This is one of my favorite surahs. I'm not surprised to find it crop up here. I'd been thinking about it most of the night, I read it, too, earlier. It ought to be floating around on my mind. I'm so fond of the indictment it levels against the listener, who must be a sinner, because we all are. It speaks with such certainty and force, and shifts so easily, into a comfort for the believer. Whatever else could ever be so strong an urge toward doing Allah's will in all ways, and not just the one to which I sometimes narrow my focus. You honor not the orphan, and you urge not the feeding of the needy.
from Abu Muhammad ibn Abi Zayd
12:00 - 31 December 2006
This is neither a hadith nor a surah, and is labeled as "hadith?" on the accompanying chart for the purposes of being succint and fitting within the box. I shall include a full translation of the relavant portion:
Faith consists of a declation by the tongue , sincerity in the heart, and practice through the limbs. It increases through an increase in practice and decreases through its decrease. Thus both decrease and increase pertain to it. The declaration of faith is not completed, except through practice. Also, neither the declaration of faith nor practice of faith is sufficient, except through the mediation of intention, and neither declaration practice, nor intention is sufficient, unless it is in agreement with the Sunna
This is an affirmation of Hadith Jibril. The rephrasing is made much more explicit, because perhaps, Muhamam, Allah's peace and blessing be upon him, was very frugal with words in the hadith. Shifting towards the simpler seems to speak to the beginnings of the decline in logic that is noted about this time. Attempting to recapture the same idea as earlier, but in more readily understood terms, seems to indicate a willingness to accept second hand sources if they are more expedient, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but is not in accordance with my normal mode of behavior. I do like ibn Abi Zayd's opinion considerably, but I can't really say there is anything new in it. From a clear mind now, I can say that all of this is contained in Hadith Jibril, and that I know this. So why recite this, and not Hadith Jibril? The fading mind, perhaps, seeks to fine some more readily attainable form.
Surah CV - The Elephant
16:00 - 31 December 2006
The recounting of the assault on Mecca. The elephant would not approach the city. The birds flung tiny stones upon the army. It has been speculated to be a metaphor for plague or leprosy or smallpox. Maybe all of these things. The elephant symbolizes the invincibility of Allah and by extension of the believers.
Twenty four hours after the start of this simple experiment, one doesn't feel so terribly sleep deprived yet, even in the peak of afternoon. There's just a little strain. One notices the army at the gates. One wants to sleep, and let loose the birds and their stones, and send the infidels away. Of course one can't, so there's always reciting this little surrah.
Surrah CVI - The Quraysh
18:00 - 31 December 2006
And then of course the next one. It follows so easily from the elephant. I can't believe there would anything more than the same desire for continuation.
Surah IV - Women
04:00 - 01 January 2007
So many little rules in this. Many irrelevant to my situation. Many usurped by secular laws which care not for the far more sensible and humane Islamic versions. But the biggest theme here is obedience. I chose this surah very deliberately. One's desire to continue pushing in an experiment such as this is sapped very quickly, especially when half my energy during the night goes to keeping myself out of frenzy when Vandercamp, who turned out to be so troublesome, runs her mouth and enrages the beast. So obedience, and a rote set of rules. Motivation, discipline. Something to keep moving forward. It works well.
Surah XI - Hood
12:00 - 01 January 2007
In particular my mind was called to verses ten through fourteen:
And if thou sayest, 'you shall surely be raised up after death,' the unbelievers will say, 'This is naught but a manifest sorcery.' And if We postpone the chastisement from them till a reckoned moment they will say 'What is detaining it?' Surely, the day it shall come to them, it shall not be turned aside from them, and they shall be encompassed by that they mocked at. And if We let a man taste mercy from Us, and then We wrest it from him, he is desperate, ungrateful. But if We let him taste prosperity after hardship that has visited him, he will say, 'The evils have gone from me'; behold, he is joyous, boastful -- save such as are patient, and do deeds of righteousness; for them awaits forgiveness and a mighty wage.
The first noon of the new year. What time better to think of how important timing is. By this point I know I'm growing impatient and angry with many things. But I know of an end. So I endure. If I do not know of this end, do I endure? It is likely I do not.
In the same sense, I am raised up after death, but my chastisement is not postponed. It is lived every night, and sometimes in the day. Condemnation on all sides, but I know an end. Save such as are patient and do deeds of righteousness; for them awaits forgiveness and a mighty wage. Is there forgiveness? I don't know. I don't care. There is a mighty wage. It is not given but taken. Earned every night spent working. The work itself is payment. I grow towards transcendence, and called upon this surah to remind me that even Allah knows I will find my reward, damnation notwithstanding.
Surah CXIV - Men
16:00 - 01 January 2007
The cryptic and final surah. I do not know why I called this to mind. I take refuge...from whispers of djinn and men Do I seek refuge? Am I seeking to be the Lord of Men, King of Men, God of Men, with whom refuge may be sought? I don't know. I must speak with someone on this.
Surah LXIII - The Hypocrites
18:00 - 01 January 2007
The whole surah is an admonition of unbelievers and the wicked. But the last line is one of my favorite in all the Quran.And God is aware of the things you do.
It's finally night again by the time I decide to bring this to mind. Was it because of those Sanctified who speak so loudly in elysium and everywhere else about their infidel's faith in stagnation and venerating a damned one as a God? Even for all the Order respects Dracula, we know better than to worship that which has been cursed by Allah.
Tangent, that. The point is, something put the idea in my head of rebuking the hypocrites. Maybe it's always in my head.
Surah CIX - The Unbelievers
23:00 - 01 January 2007
This is the quite possibly the only thing in the Quran I outright disagree with.
Say to the Unbeliever you are not serving what I serve, and I am not serving what you serve
It's not true. It can't be true. I see so many do the work of Allah and not believe, not know, not understand that it is the work of Allah they do. I think this surfaces as a reaction to the last, The Hypocrites. Where with that, I am so quick to rage and hatred against the non believers of one stripe, here, I see unbelievers of a better caliber treated the same, and, even if that is how Allah shall judge, it is not how I shall judge. I am not Allah and I am not bound to work against the unbelievers. In fact, it is the categoric rejection of this surah which makes it possible for me to pursue change, which is Allah's will, in a meaningful way. As threats against the Order slowly bubble to the surface, this small self-affirmation of my faith in it is pleasant.
Surah CXIII - Daybreak
04:00 - 02 January 2007
Here it is said that one takes refuge from the evil in the gathering darkness. I am the evil in the gathering darkness. The last few hours before another long day inside. I know why my mind moves to this surah. It's not the simple superficiality, that daybreak is near. It's more this realization of the strange relation I have to a religion which either does not acknowledge the existence of my species, or which has been censored in such acknowledgment, most likely, by my own species.
The point is, that as the sun rises to call humanity to rise, and seeks to drag me to sleep, I am reminded that I am not human, and that Islam is not the same for me, as it is for everyone else.
Surah XCI - The Sun
12:00 - 02 January 2007 16:00 - 02 January 2007 18:00 - 02 January 2007 23:00 - 02 January 2007
I began to become obsessed with this surah as the experiment neared it's end.
To be perfectly honest with myself and whosoever reads this, the content of the surah is fairly worthless to me. It's a recounting, some poetic language, and all this. Very glorifying, though. And I take it somewhat personally. I am the sun, in many ways. As I reached the end of this experiment, the point past which I could not likely push myself much further, it is clear my psyche has receded heavily into pure ego.
There is so much here, I must speak with someone of sufficient caliber on it. But the Sun is my fate card and I am very aware of this, and proud of it. It is at least some of why I choose the banes. So some morning not long from now, I will walk out at dawn, and watch the sun climb over the horizon before I go inside to sleep.
The exposure of my pridefulness in such a blatant manner, is rather interesting. It might seem, that sleep deprivation pushes us towards our flaws and vices, makes them more prominent. It is worth examining in other subjects, at least, and may be a viable way to determine the foremost of one's vices. I think it should be compared with the test offered by the fate cards.